Greetings Friends,

     In this piece I'll discuss why I am happy. It isn't because I've accomplished remarkable things, have large quantities of property or wealth, or have much power and influence. I don't have those things and my happiness doesn't depend on them. I am happy simply because...I am. Simple, right? Okay, okay, I realize readers will want a more substantial answer than that, so here goes.

     I've heard it said before that if someone is to be truly happy, then he/she must first experience a significant amount of unhappiness. I have no idea at all about whether this is true or not, but my own path to happiness seems to have taken that direction. It was only a few years ago that I was angry, hateful, anxious, fearful, and very insecure. On top of all that, I felt I needed to prove something to myself and to the world. Only then could my existence be significant and worthwhile. Unsure of what to do, I became a breeding ground of internal turmoil and aggravation. The world wasn't a good place - I thought - and I was pissed off about it. Screw everyone and everything - I'll do something to change this world or go down trying. Victory or Valhalla! Such was my thinking at the time.

     The festering malignancy of my internal doubts and personal insecurities took control of me. They were in the driver's seat of my existence, and I was being dragged along for the bumpy ride.

     About one year ago, things had improved a bit for me. I was no longer bursting at the seams with resentment and aggravation. This was a good thing, but I still lacked contentment and fulfillment in life - and therefore I was still in danger of regressing into my bad habits.

     After looking into deeper spirituality - and evaluating my own life and the values I held - many interesting things began to happen. My life improved as I learned to look at things with a new, refined perspective. My attitude and mindset became much more positive. Breathing techniques, meditation, and higher principles have helped me gain control of myself. I am no longer dominated by internal feelings - it is easier to just watch them come and go. This is true freedom, and it feels good!

     Perhaps most importantly of all, I can now see that happiness comes from within. During those days of negativity what I needed was inside all along. I just needed to look there. I can see an inner light, and this inner light is Divine. Everybody has it - it just usually takes a very special person to help someone like me realize it. This special type of person is often called a Guru. After getting even just a little glimpse of the inner light I notice that I have an overall feeling of gratitude. This is much better than the resentment I was previously living with. The darkness that pervaded my life has passed away. Best of all, I'm now protected from it ever returning again. It's all thanks to my ability to see the inner light.

     To me, this is the meaning of "Jai Gurudev!" Jai means "victory" and Gurudev can refer to the Guru or to the inner light (or both at the same time, as I like to think about it). That's a little bit about why I'm happy. I'm also grateful - for the Guru, for noticing the inner light, and for all of you. So, Jai Gurudev!

Mike